blog, boxing, clothes, Dating, fashion, food, gossip, Hair, humor, Kardashians, Khloe Kardashian, kim Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, life, life&style, MAC, makeup, men, news, reading, sex, sex relationships, shopping, women, writer, writers, writing

Mayweather / Pacquiao

WHOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAA BABY I CAN’T WAIT UNTIL SATURDAY!!!!! I’m not a boxing fan but Floyd Mayweather is gonna get that ass BEAT!!!! #MannyForTheWin…….. Are any of you guys watching the fight? Are you a boxing fan??? Who are you rooting for??? Why?? Do you think it’s RIDICULOUS that he’ll make 180 MILLION dollars either way????

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Amber portwood, blog, boxing, clothes, Dating, Farrah Abraham, fashion, food, gossip, Hair, Hollywood, humor, Kardashians, Khloe Kardashian, kim Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, life, life&style, love, MAC, makeup, men, news, passion, reading, sex, sex relationships, shade, shopping, Teen Mom, Teen Mom OG, women, writer, writers, writing

KEEPING UP WITH THE KARDASHIANS

I know I’m NOT the only person who has a SLIGHT addiction to watching the Kardashians. I will sit and watch like I’m a really big fan but in actuality, I really don’t get what it is exactly that they do! I know that they have stores, makeup, shoes, yadda yadda yadda…..But besides getting those¬† up and running (which is usually Kourtney and Khloe), what do they do?? Why do we continuously watch??? All they really ever do is sit around and talk, have lunch, have babies ( one is going HARD to get pregnant again), and take vacations. Oh and get married a lot. But what is it about THEIR lives do we enjoy watching?¬† I do have to give MRS WEST her props because she made an entire family famous off of sucking and fucking. Now THAT’S a power move! How many empires have been built on something like that?? The crazy parts (yes, there are parts lol) are, their stepfather is Bruce Jenner…. THEE Bruce Jenner!! THEE GOLD MEDAL WINNER!!!! I had NO clue who he was until they came along. lmao…. Sorry……….. Their father helped O.j win that trial. Their dad was HUGE then but….. We STILL didn’t know who she was. Then……. the tape drops! Now they’re EVERYWHERE! I’m NOT a hater, nor am I jealous. I’m just trying to figure out how to get MY tape of sucking and fucking LEAKED, so that I can put my family on too!!!! I think I’m pretty good at sucking dick. I’ve never gotten a complaint from my boyfriend. He’s pretty satisfied. I would get a bad ass weave, some sexy ass lingerie, shave that bush down there, and suck the shit out of the dick. What do you think??? You think it will sell?? I can only try and see right?? She did and now look…. #EVERYWHERE!!!

Amber portwood, blog, boxing, clothes, Dating, Farrah Abraham, fashion, food, gossip, Hair, Hollywood, humor, Kardashians, Khloe Kardashian, kim Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, life, life&style, love, MAC, makeup, men, news, passion, reading, sex, sex relationships, shade, shopping, Teen Mom, Teen Mom OG, women, writer, writers, writing

Sex and Older men

Have you ever dated and or slept with an older man?? I’m not talking about 1-5 years or 20+ years older. Like in between 5-10 year difference between the two of yous? What was and/or what is the sex like?? Does he need viagra yet? Does he fuck you good and hard?? Does he eat the pussy like groceries?? The reason why I’m asking is because I am dating an older man (10 yr difference) and man oh MAN does he do me right!!! Now I have dealt with men my age and SOME of them were great and quite a bit of them were trash! Dick didn’t reach over their.balls after that shit got hard. TERRIBLE… Just terrible!! Some had noodle dicks, long but hold no weight and fuck like jack rabbits. I HATE THAT!!!! You barely have time to get yours before they’ve already came. You got to GO HOME NOW with that bullshit!! Now I’m gonna either do me and finish this shit myself OR call in back up and get done right. But my guy, ha…..FAAAAARRRRRR from all of that. When we first slept together, I thought his dick game was gonna be WACK AS HELL! All I kept thinking was, ” He’s OLD. He needs pills to get that shit up!” Yea well, ALL WRONG!! That man wore my young ass OUT!! I’ve never met a man MY AGE that could fuck me good and proper, cum, and ten minutes later be ready to fuck me exactly like he just did. This is some of the best dick I’ve ever had. And he STILL doesn’t need any pills to get that shit up and going. My baby strong like BULL! So ladies, if any older gentleman decides to hit on, and he doesn’t look bad, smells good, and he doesn’t come at you crazy, give him a chance. Just might be exactly what you needed in your life! #GetSome

blog, boxing, clothes, Dating, Farrah Abraham, fashion, food, gossip, Hair, Hollywood, humor, Kardashians, Khloe Kardashian, kim Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, life, life&style, love, MAC, makeup, men, news, passion, reading, sex, sex relationships, shade, shopping, Teen Mom, Teen Mom OG, women, writer, writers, writing

The SWEETEST of meats

How many of you gals AND guys like sweet meat??? I’m talking about the SWEETEST of the meats? I’m talking about as soon as you hear or see the meat approaching you get excited. You salivate about the meat. The meat entices you.You sometimes even catch yourself looking at other people’s plates looking at their sweet meat like. ” DAMMMMMMMNNNNNNN, that meat looks good as shit!!” That first moment you put the meat in.your mouth and your eyes lit up and you got all giddy inside because you didn’t think it was gonna taste that good. It kinda makes you moan a little bit like sex. Do you put all the meat in your mouth or do you go at it little by little??? What was your first experience like when you first tasted sweet meat??? It doesn’t really stink, UNLESS they don’t prepare it right. I like my sweet meat prepared the right way. I prefer less skin (bad for your health), and NO SALT!! I have high blood pressure ok!!!! Oh, and if you haven’t noticed, I’m talking about PENIS!!!! #SweetMeat

blog, Dating, humor, Kardashians, Khloe Kardashian, kim Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, life, life&style, makeup, men, reading, sex, sex relationships, shopping, women, writer, writers, writing

Eyebrow madness

Ok… So it’s NO surprise…. I don’t know shit about makeup but I keep on trying. I don’t know what brands are the best for colored ladies… Shit… I don’t know what brands are best for any ladies. There’s so many different names and products that it can be a bit confusing. I see mascara that is sold for like 10-20 dollars. For MASCARA???? Really???? I remember when you could get mascara for .99 cents. Boy, have times changed. But let’s talk about this eyebrow thing. So, I USED to have big, full, THICK eyebrows, but unfortunately when I was in cosmetology school ( YES, I went to school for hair and beauty and don’t know shit, I left my last year and that was that. Trippy! lol…. but I did get my diploma) ok back to what I was talking about, Oh yes these brows. A classmate decided to experiment with the wax and my dumbass signed up to be first. Welllll…. my shit went from thick and full to slim and BARELY there! SHE FUCKED ME UP! You talk about LAUGH.. That’s all we could do. Every time someone looked at me, we would bust out laughing. So for the last 15 years, I’ve had some pretty jacked up eyebrows. How do I tend to them you ask?? I just take a razor and shape them and fix them but the downside to that is itchy ass eyebrows. Do know what its like to talk to someone and your eyebrows are itchy as hell?? You look simple and like you have something. NOT COOL. So then I tried to order those eyebrow stencils so that I could fix them and that didn’t work. I don’t know how to use them. I literally have to tape them to my face in order to use them and I still come out looking like Ray Charles did them. I’ve tried pencils, and those eyebrow kits from Amazon. My next step is magic marker. I know I should just let them grow out and go to someone and get them done right but I want to be able to do this. I wanna be hands on. I know your probably thinking, ” Who in Sam hell buys makeup off of Amazon,” but shit I had free Amazon money, why not. I need help BIG-TIME!! I have started to watch some of those YouTube videos on how to apply makeup and sweet CHRISTMAS, there’s a lot. I’m willing to try ANYTHING. I just a lil bit of guidance that’s all. Thanks guys

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p.s…….. PLEASE don’t mind my bonnet….. I had thee WORST hair experience EVER and I just can’t talk about it right now because I’m just gonna get upset again…… Oh but I’m DEFINITELY going to talk about it because it was DISASTROUS!! Lol

Amber portwood, blog, boxing, clothes, Dating, Farrah Abraham, fashion, food, gossip, Hair, Hollywood, humor, Kardashians, Khloe Kardashian, kim Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, life, life&style, love, MAC, makeup, men, news, passion, reading, sex, sex relationships, shade, shopping, Teen Mom, Teen Mom OG, women, writer, writers, writing

Waist trainers and Wrapping

Yea……. I TRIED it…….. Wrapped myself up like a burrito SUPER DUPER tight in saran wrap, added fourteen different layers of clothing, then added one of those plastic sweat suits ON TOP of all of that and got under ALL of the heaviest blankets I have, put the fan in my face and went to sleep. MANNNNNNNNNNNNNN listen……. I woke up DRENCHED as all hell!! I’m talking about change everything I have on, including my draws and TRY to go back to sleep. Why go back to sleep you ask??? Because I had only been asleep for 4 hours!!!! It was only 3 am!!! I can’t handle doing that shit every night. I’ve changed so much that my boyfriend thinks I’m doing midnight performances and cheating because I wake up dressed in something totally different. So then I thought about getting a waist trainer. I’ve heard good things but then I’ve heard some bad things. I’m just trying to get my waist snatched a LIL bit…NOT break my ribs. Lol…. Are they safe??? Do you recommend trying one?? There’s TONS of people pushing this one and that one but what one REALLY snatches you WITHOUT snatching you and crippling you at the same time?

blog, clothes, Dating, fashion, food, gossip, Hair, humor, Kardashians, Khloe Kardashian, kim Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, life, life&style, MAC, makeup, men, news, reading, sex, sex relationships, shopping, women, writer, writers, writing

MAKEUP 101

I’ve NEVER worn makeup before…..WAIT…..Let me correct that….. I BARELY wear makeup. The only thing I’ve ever worn was mascara and lip gloss and to be completely honest I don’t know shit about makeup. I still buy wet and wild cosmetics. I have NO idea what to buy. I know I can watch YouTube videos about applying makeup but that’s NOT the problem…… The problem is… what products to buy. I’m not trying to walk around looking like I have peanut butter smeared all over my face because I’ve seen ladies and an even men now, walking around with that look. It’s NOT a good look either. lmao….sorry….. I am a light skinned gal and I’ve got some dark spots as well……. So let’s talk…. What are YOUR go-to products for a clean, fresh, NON peanut butter cakey look? What keeps your makeup fresh and funky? What helps keep your makeup in tact so that it doesn’t run down your face and you end up looking like you have a melted ice cream sundae with all the works running down your face!!!!